05 BEAUTY TIPS (re-defined)
This blog is dedicated to re-defining beauty. We have been taught to believe that beauty is found and seen externally (in our appearance). I have seen one too many ‘beauty tip’ blogs, articles, campaigns etc. that are bombarding our society with a message that you ‘need this’, have to ‘wear that’ and should ‘look like this’ in order to measure up to our society’s unattainable and unrealistic standards of beauty. It is time to RE-DEFINE beauty. Being beautiful shouldn’t have anything to do with your external appearance. Instead it should have everything to do with WHO you are, the state of your mind and the quality of your heart & soul.
We need to raise a generation of women who don’t find their worth in their appearance. A generation that are freedom fighters and value placers. A generation that loves fearlessly, is kind above all else and is passionate about lifting each other up. We need to raise a generation of women who understand that the greatness of their life’s entire existence does not depend on what they look like.
The next 10 tips have been things that I have learnt and are things that I believe make a woman beautiful. I hope you enjoy these (re-defined) beauty tips! I hope that they are eye-opening and help open the door to re-defining how we (you and I) define beauty.
There’s nothing more beautiful than a woman who is confident in her true, authentic self. I believe that there is no coincidence that the word ‘beautiful’, is known for being pronounced as: ‘Be- You - Tiful’. So, to be beautiful means to be you, to be yourself.
And this is my NUMBER ONE beauty tip: BE BOLD. BE BRAVE. BE YOU.
It costs nothing to be kind and it’s one of the most generous gifts you can give! Always be kinder than you feel. To everyone, always.
Our society has created a culture that has taught us that we as women are in competition with one another; that it is in our nature to compare. We have learnt that we can’t all be beautiful, succeed and be celebrated at the same time. We have acquired a belief that ‘she needs to be less than in order for me to feel more than’. It’s time to un-learn this. It’s time for this to change. This is your reminder that another woman’s beauty is not the absence of your own. You can celebrate HER whilst still appreciating YOU. We are all able to co-exist and lift each other up to be the best version of our beautiful individual self.
Spend as much time working on your insides as you do your outsides. We put so much time, energy, effort and money into our external appearance and neglect the most important thing of all; our heart, mind & soul. It’s time to invest in a counselling session to improve our mental health instead of that $150 brow tint & lamination. It’s time to put effort into loving ourselves unconditionally instead of figuring out what lip liner colour to use to make our lips look fuller. It’s time to put energy into studying yourself (your likes, passions, what fills you with joy) instead of studying gossip, celebrity news and the latest beauty tips in the magazine.
Our looks FADE! I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to get to the end of my life and realise I spent so much of my precious time trying to ‘fix’ something that:
never needed ‘fixing’
is ever-changing and in the end, actually fades.
I want to get to the end of my life and feel confident that I invested my time, energy & effort wisely. I don’t want to spend every precious second of my life being at war with my body. I want to get to the end of my life and be grateful that I used my time to love EVERY INCH of my being and love it unconditionally.
(Please note: I am not saying don’t ever invest into your appearance. It’s important to feel your best & look after yourself! I just believe that it should never be at the expense of your mental/emotional/spiritual health).
The words we speak over ourselves (and others) hold so much power.
Our words can destruct or give life; they’re either poison or fruit… and you have the ability to chose what path your words take.
Choose to change your confession from negative to positive and speak life-giving, encouraging and inspiring words over yourself (and others).
Tip: Look in the mirror and tell yourself everything you love about yourself (internal & external). I love to leave sticky notes all over my bathroom mirrors with positive confessions as a physical reminder that I am beautiful in ways the eye can not see. That I am smart and kind and I have more to offer to the world than what I look like.
A little reminder: the girl in the mirror is not your enemy, she’s your best friend. She’s your home. Treat her well & with respect and speak to her kindly.
Everyone is fighting a silent battle that you know nothing about. It’s important to ask questions. Be curious and open the door to understanding and perspective. This will help you to create a new habit and stop a cycle of defaulting to judgement when you don’t understand why someone is behaving ‘that way’ or saying ‘the wrong thing’. Being curious always wins over being judgemental.
(Actually harder than I thought! But, it’s well worth putting in the practice.)
Avoid conversations that bond over gossip. Don’t find your highs in the lows of others.
Radhi Shetty says it beautifully:
Go on a soul search and understand what the vacancy in the heart is longing for. Find the root cause for the problem… don’t bandaid it with gossip. It will create a larger void and leave you feeling more empty.
Search for & find whatever is good for your soul and do that, every day! Implement it into your every day as much as you can and watch your outlook, mood & life improve in ways you never thought was possible!
Oh boy do I wish I learnt this one sooner! We tell ourselves so many stories… and more times than not, these stories in our mind are created from false facts, untrue/exaggerated statements or the spiralling of negative thoughts. These ‘made up’ stories in our head can cause hurt and destruction (to ourselves & others). Choosing to have generous assumptions towards everyone & every situation stops the creation of these destructive stories. When you do this you’ll find you are slower to become offended, you are better able to genuinely listen when others are speaking and you are able to forgive wholeheartedly.
I could do the most amazing of things, speak beautiful words over myself & others and have the most extravagant of generous gestures but all of it means nothing if I don’t sincerely mean it and do it with LOVE. Do everything with love. Let love be your highest goal.
I hope you found these tips helpful! I’d love to hear your thoughts on how you define beauty and I’d love to learn from you, too! Let’s re-define beauty TOGETHER.
Sending love always,
Harms xox
Disclaimer: I am not a health professional. All of my learnings have been formed from personal experience and from regular counselling sessions. If you need help and guidance, I would highly recommend you sought after a psychologist, counsellor or health care professional.