04 My journaling style: 3 Steps to opening your life to JOY.
I start every morning by opening my journal and pouring my heart onto a blank page. There is something so encouraging and inspiring yet also intriguing about a blank page. It is FULL of endless possibilities, new opportunities and brings forth the awakening of a fresh start towards new and broadened horizons. Because of this, I believe every day is filled with fresh opportunities to start again, improve the person you were yesterday and become the best version of yourself EVERY day.
I can't go a day without journaling and I notice a difference in my mood and outlook when I don't do it for a day. Journaling for me is a special outlet where I let myself be completely vulnerable (with myself) and use the space to be dedicated to the betterment of myself. When I do this I find my relationship with myself and others starts to flourish in beautiful ways.
I journal about:
My thoughts and feelings (positive + negative, about myself, others, God and the world around me)
Goals and intentions for the day ahead
Re-visit and remind myself of the ‘big picture’ goals I have for myself (At the start of every new year, I write a list of 10 goals for the year… big & small, extravagant & simple and usually cover all of the 5 pillars of health.)
Things that concern me or that don’t make sense to me
Things I am grateful for
Things I’d like to improve on (mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically + socially)
One of the most frequent questions I get asked is: “How do I start journaling?”
This is such a great question!! Sometimes journaling can seem a little daunting and it’s hard to know where to start, what to write about or how to be motivated to do it every day!!
Below I am going to give you an insight into my style of journaling, tips on how to stay motivated and what has helped me fall In Love with this act of self love
HOW I JOURNAL: 3 Steps to opening your life to JOY.
Start with gratitude
Gratitude opens your heart to thankfulness and abundance. It sets the tone for the day and allows your day to ooze with joy. I once heard Brene Brown state that,
“I made a promise to myself that I will never use the word joy without mentioning the word gratitude. This is because in my 12 years of study & research, I haven’t met one person who is FULL of joy that hasn’t practiced gratitude every day”.
Wow. Powerful, right?
So many of us (myself included), wake up in the morning and the first thing we think about is our lack; what we don’t have and why we don’t deserve the things that make us happy. When you start your day with gratitude, it does the opposite. It opens the opportunity to set a beautiful and life-GIVING tone for the day! It allows you to remind yourself of all the things in your life that you DO have!
I don’t know about you, but I want to live in a state of joy and abundance (not lack).
So, to do this, every morning I write down 3 things I am grateful for and WHY! They can be small and seemingly insignificant (nothing that seems insignificant ever is!) or they can be large and mind-blowing! Whatever it is, allow 3 minutes every morning to step into a state of thankfulness and watch not only your day change but your life change, too.
2. Reflection on thoughts and feelings
Most thoughts are subconscious which means half the time you don’t even know the thoughts you are thinking or the feelings you are feeling. When I start writing, it’s like a crazy ‘out-of-body’ experience where I gain a different perspective of what my mind is thinking and my heart is feeling.
Some of the time these thoughts and feelings are very valid and come from a place of past trauma & experiences or learned patterns of thinking & behaving. Other times, they are completely ridiculous and I giggle to myself that I was even thinking and feeling such things.
By writing these things down, I am able to decipher whether the thoughts and feelings are REAL or whether I can just let them go with ease. Which brings me to the pep-talk part of my journaling (hehe my fav part).
For personal + private reasons, I won’t share my actual thought processes with my journaling. However, this image to the right is my words written straight after a big emotional burst (21 Aug 2021). I was stuck in a tough situation and was projecting the blame onto others. So, I decided to stop the blame game and actually look deeper - figure out what I was doing wrong and how I could make the situation a little better.
3. Pep-talk
Once I know how I am feeling, usually I will encourage myself or give myself a little pep talk. I write about how I could better address a situation, how I could be my best self in a particular circumstance or encourage myself with words of kindness and compassion.
Once I do this I feel equipped to move on with my day with CONFIDENCE.
Some days I need to encourage myself or give myself a pep-talk on the same topic (for consecutive days/weeks). Some times I only need to do it once. And other times, I revisit emotions and feelings from years ago that have resurfaced in new and different ways. It’s always different and I can never predict what will happen when I put the pen to paper… and maybe that is the hidden beauty about it!
I love taking a sentence or two from this part of my journaling and making a quote. This is usually what you all see on my IG stories :)
REMINDER:
Every day comes with different feelings which means each day your journaling will look completely different. Sometimes there’s lots to write about, other days there isn’t. Some days I write 10 pages, other days I just write something encouraging or inspiring to myself that is only a few words long. Some days I journal for 30 mins - 1 hour, other days it’s only 5 minutes. So, don’t be hard on yourself! Go with the flow and don’t force anything either. Journaling is about connecting back to your true and authentic self and being mindful! And this also looks different every day
MOTIVATION
Once you start journaling and feel the beautiful effects it has on yourself, your mood, your outlook AND your life, it’s hard NOT to be motivated to do it every day! It becomes like medicine you need every day to survive (emotionally + mentally)!
However, in the waiting and in between seasons before you start to feel the full effects… here are some things I found useful to stay motivated to do it every day:
Leave your journal and a pen next to your bedside table so it is the first thing you see when you wake up. I found this a great reminder to pick up my journal first thing in the morning.
Set a reminder 5 mins after your “wake up” alarm to journal.
Buy a journal that makes you want to put pen to paper!! For me personally, I love blank pages that are beautifully curated. Cotton paper that is bound together by thin wool is usually my favourite. And I absolutely love soft, leather covers. (Link to my fav journal at the moment https://www.loktaa.com/product/handmade-paper-notebook-cornflower-petals/65?cp=true&sa=false&sbp=false&q=false&category_id=9)
Get an awesome pen. I have one from Kikki K that has the words “live in the moment” engraved on it. I love using a thin, ballpoint pen because it’s feels amazing to write with and looks beautiful and effortless on paper too
https://www.kikki-k.com/au/slim-ballpoint-pens-4pk-inspiration-11204601.htmlFind a space that will be your go-to space for journaling. I find this helps because when I sit in this space, I know that it is where I journal - so it’s easy to find the motivation to open my book and write. Some spaces could be: A corner in your home with a comfy chair, somewhere outdoors; by the ocean or in the bush, in bed, on a particular corner of a table… anywhere! Mine is on the corner of my coffee table… I sit on the floor and have my coffee and journal on the table. I sometimes light the candle too :)
Combine your journaling practice to an already established habit! For example, I journal whilst having my morning coffee. Because I drink my coffee every morning I know to grab my journal at the same time now! It makes it easier to create a habit to journal when you do it with an already exisiting habit that is second nature for you!
One of my favourite journal prompts is “what is this teaching me?”.
I truly believe that some of life’s greatest gifts are the lessons we learn from hard things we’ve been through. They are invaluable and shape the person we are!
So, if you are going through a tough, challenging, confusing or intimidating season, ask yourself: “What is this teaching me? What is something I can learn from this? How can I use this invaluable lesson to expand, evolve and grow?”
I have teamed up with a friend of mine, Christie Kirk, to write a list of our favourite journal prompts that you can use whilst you are starting journaling OR that you can use when you feel like you’ve hit a block and have no idea what to write about! (see attached below). Christie is a Counsellor and Founder of Blank Canvas Collective.
I hope this was helpful and has inspired you to put pen to paper and explore the world of journaling as an act of self love. This style of journaling works very well for me. However, I understand there are SO many other ways to do this and we are all individuals. This means, find your unique style! Pick and choose what you love from the journaling style of others, write about what sets your soul on fire and find a rhythm that works well for YOU. You’ve got this.
Sending love always,
Harms xox
Click here to download your Journal Prompt Guide (for free hehe).